Pause and Breath: A Reflection on the Amazing Leadership Session we had with Anthony DeMauro
Get a coffee. Work hard. Say yes to everything. Get another coffee. Work harder. What, sleep? You’ll sleep when you die. Get one more coffee. Concentrate. But also multitask. But also concentrate.
I don’t know about you people but this sums up my university life. We are constantly being bombarded with things that we should do. We brag about how busy we are. How much time we don’t have for anything. I don’t know the average number of coffee that I drink every day. Probably more than the number of glasses of water I drink. Oh yes, definitely more than the number of glasses of water I drink.
Even for the things that I normally would love to do, I feel this need for “productivity.” I choose the fastest playing version on the Sims 4, which is ironic really. I don’t have the time to watch the details of my child sim’s life.
We are cheering ourselves with small dopamine hits of accomplishments. Crossings on our to-do lists. At every decision we take, we take the most multi-tasked one.
I then realized that I didn’t remember the times I’ve lived. I was racing with some unknown identity, maybe an idol of my over-productive mind. Actions fall into categories easily. We don’t remember them one by one. We just remember a pile of things that we did once. All dull and far away now. Again, actions fall into categories easily. But moments don’t. And at one point, I’ve realized this.
Only realizing did not make a huge difference though. We are buried into this lifestyle of “run mode.” One action of self-care does not really do much. Self-care isn’t something that you do one time and just move on. It should be consistent. It is something that you should choose to bury into your life. It should be sustainable in that sense. It should make your life sustainable. And I am grateful for the leadership seminar that Anthony DeMauro chose to make on that point.
He reminded us that our time is limited. At every “yes” that we say to one thing, we say “no” to another. We say “no” to our loved ones. We say “no” to our hobbies. We say “no” to ourselves. It is not selfish to choose what you do wisely. The world is yours, but the time isn’t.
Instead of scrolling social media 5 minutes more, it would be much better to sit for 5 minutes. Stop for a while, maybe think about how you feel right now. Take a deep breath, enjoy the silence. Or the bird noises. Or if you are living in a concrete jungle like I do, listen to the sound of the street. Be less focused on the things that you should do one hour later. If you are not doing it, why are you thinking it?
These may sound like a waste of time now but think about your efficiency. It is not only good for your overall mental health, but it is also good for the things that you were jeopardizing your mental health for.
With the help of Anthony DeMauro, we remembered that all these “selfish” actions are normal and healthy. It is okay to take space for yourself. Life is not a to-do list. It is hidden in the moments of our daily lives. You can’t see them when you are running. I would like to thank Mr. DeMauro for this seminar, I am very much grateful for his teachings and practices on this seminar. And thank all of my GLLS companions for sharing this experience with me!
Selin Yavuz
